Affair Boosters?

During the affair, did your spouse have a small group of friends who thought that everything they were doing was just fine?

Did he or she make new ones, and stop spending time with those people who would not be supportive of their affair relationship?

Mine sure did.

During the time he was cheating, he began to distance himself from his friends and even his family who he knew would not support the affair. It’s understandable. After all, knowing how they felt, how could he look them in the face while he was cheating on his wife?

He made new friends, and one thing that really struck me at the time was that these people really were jerks! I couldn’t understand what he saw in them. They cheated on their wives regularly, and bragged abut it to one another. I think that, in them, he saw two people who he thought would understand him and not look down on him. He felt guilty enough himself without having it rubbed in his face by those he felt were “judging” him.

These two would give him advice on how to keep the affair a secret from me,  how to spend time with her without me being suspicious, and even on how to make me feel guilty for asking questions ( this is called “gas lighting’” which will be the topic of another post)…

The more they encouraged him, the less he saw that what he was doing was wrong.

With friends like that, who needs enemies?