Monogamy feels right for me…
When I read stories about affairs, they often make me shake my head
in disbelief. how could someone do something that would hurt another
person so much?
For some, the excuse lies in the belief that human beings are not, by nature, a monogamous sort of creature. They feel that we are somehow “wired” to cheat, to sleep around with as many partners as we can get and spread our DNA all over the place. They condescendingly remark ” we are no naturally monogamous” and go on about their lives like a human wrecking ball.
Funny how the ones who feel we are not capable of having only one partner at a time are the ones cheating, and they are often the first to become livid if there is even a hint that their “soul mate” affair partner might still be sleeping with their spouse or have another affair partner besides them. Can you say “double standard”? I knew you could!
These are the self proclaimed free spirits and “grey thinkers” who will bend and twist the rules so long as they suit them. When this is pointed out, they just don’t seem to get it. How can anyone else not see that the world must chnage or them and their needs, not the other way around.
Then there are those who drag religion into the argument, and pont out that monogamy is merely a vestige of a time when religion ruled society…to them, it;s kind of like an appendix. Not necessary anymore, and should be removed if it causes them irritation.
These are the people who are zealots, but not for religion, but for science. They drag out every statistic they can find ( and love to quote ” reputable journal articles” n the misguided hope that it will make them sound educated and witty, when , in fact, it just makes them sound like pompous windbag blowhards) and twist it to support their argument.
Their face always falls when I point out that I am agnostic, yet I am monogamous.
The whole argument is tiring, and the cherry on top of it all is ” you never know until you are in that situation yourself what you will do, so don’t judge me”. ( this again, is the clarion call of the cheater and unrepentant other man/woman).
I always find this argument silly. Do these people not think that I’ve been it on plenty of times while I’ve been married? It happens a lot, but i still somehow am able to say “no” . Funny how two letters take so much more effort to say that “yes”, which has three letters
!
When all their arguments fail, they then sink to the level of quibbling about the semantics of the situation.
All that being said, I would like to say once and for all that I am monogamous. I have no interest in being in a relationship or being intimate with more than one person at a time. The whole idea upsets me and makes me very confused. It always has. It’s not had for me to say “no”, in fact, it’s very easy .
I’m not saying everyone thinks like I do, or that I am better than anyone else. There are people who don’t find that monogamy works for them, yet they do not cheat. they simply don’t promise to be faithful. This way, both people in a relationship know what to expect. They can both make a choice.
If they want to get married, discuss this issue beforehand, and set the rules down first. If ti will be an “open marriage”, this is so important. It can’t really be called “open” if only one person knows that the door is ajar.
Doesn’t this make sense?
Of course, in the washed out, shadowing world of the “grey thinker”, it is, to quote Mr. Gore ” an inconvenient truth”
I am like the albatros. I will be with my mate for life. I also tend to wander around a lot-lol
For some, the excuse lies in the belief that human beings are not, by nature, a monogamous sort of creature. They feel that we are somehow “wired” to cheat, to sleep around with as many partners as we can get and spread our DNA all over the place. They condescendingly remark ” we are no naturally monogamous” and go on about their lives like a human wrecking ball.
Funny how the ones who feel we are not capable of having only one partner at a time are the ones cheating, and they are often the first to become livid if there is even a hint that their “soul mate” affair partner might still be sleeping with their spouse or have another affair partner besides them. Can you say “double standard”? I knew you could!
These are the self proclaimed free spirits and “grey thinkers” who will bend and twist the rules so long as they suit them. When this is pointed out, they just don’t seem to get it. How can anyone else not see that the world must chnage or them and their needs, not the other way around.
Then there are those who drag religion into the argument, and pont out that monogamy is merely a vestige of a time when religion ruled society…to them, it;s kind of like an appendix. Not necessary anymore, and should be removed if it causes them irritation.
These are the people who are zealots, but not for religion, but for science. They drag out every statistic they can find ( and love to quote ” reputable journal articles” n the misguided hope that it will make them sound educated and witty, when , in fact, it just makes them sound like pompous windbag blowhards) and twist it to support their argument.
Their face always falls when I point out that I am agnostic, yet I am monogamous.
The whole argument is tiring, and the cherry on top of it all is ” you never know until you are in that situation yourself what you will do, so don’t judge me”. ( this again, is the clarion call of the cheater and unrepentant other man/woman).
I always find this argument silly. Do these people not think that I’ve been it on plenty of times while I’ve been married? It happens a lot, but i still somehow am able to say “no” . Funny how two letters take so much more effort to say that “yes”, which has three letters
!When all their arguments fail, they then sink to the level of quibbling about the semantics of the situation.
All that being said, I would like to say once and for all that I am monogamous. I have no interest in being in a relationship or being intimate with more than one person at a time. The whole idea upsets me and makes me very confused. It always has. It’s not had for me to say “no”, in fact, it’s very easy .
I’m not saying everyone thinks like I do, or that I am better than anyone else. There are people who don’t find that monogamy works for them, yet they do not cheat. they simply don’t promise to be faithful. This way, both people in a relationship know what to expect. They can both make a choice.
If they want to get married, discuss this issue beforehand, and set the rules down first. If ti will be an “open marriage”, this is so important. It can’t really be called “open” if only one person knows that the door is ajar.
Doesn’t this make sense?
Of course, in the washed out, shadowing world of the “grey thinker”, it is, to quote Mr. Gore ” an inconvenient truth”
I am like the albatros. I will be with my mate for life. I also tend to wander around a lot-lol
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